Don't go!!

The week before Jason left for Afghanistan was very emotional for me. We filled up the week with lots of fun activities to help distract us from the sadness.

We spent one day at the beach. I didn't get many pictures, but here's one of Benny climbing out of the sand fort.

Jason took both of the older kids on their own little date. Graham got to go miniature golfing with Dad all by himself. Lucy and J went bowling and then got some frozen yogurt. It gave him time to talk to each of them one on one about his deployment.

There was lots of time on the trampoline. The kids absolutely love jumping on the tramp with Daddy.

A couple nights before he left, I made his favorite oatmeal chocolate chip cookies. Here's Benny enjoying his treat.

We also had a special Family Home Evening the night before he left. We talked a little bit about Afghanistan and showed some pictures from his last deployment two years ago. Jason gave each of us a priesthood blessing. A friend from the ward came to give him a blessing earlier in the day.

The Sunday morning that he left was horrible. We had decided a couple weeks before that we weren't going to drive Jason to the base and say our goodbyes there. We wanted to just do it at home, so one of J's friends came to pick him up around 9:30 am. I can't even describe how sad it was. We had a family prayer and then Graham started with the tears about half an hour before he left. When the doorbell rang and it was time for him to go, Lucy started up and it was just like a scene from a movie. I'm sure Jason's single friend thought we were insane.

The first few moments right after he had driven away were very, very dark for me. Lucy and I were having a hard time. I was trying to reassure her. A special thing happened after that. I decided that we needed to say and prayer and before I had even finished, my sweet friend, Joan, knocked on the door. She is our Relief Society president in the ward and I serve as her 2nd counselor. Joan is about my own mom's age and she reminds me a lot of her sometimes. I opened the door and she just gave me the longest hug and let me cry and cry. Then, she helped me get my kids ready for church while I curled my hair and put on my makeup.

We made it through church. There were a lot of tears from me and I spent a lot of time in the bathroom, but there were lots of friends that cried with me and I got many, many hugs from a very supportive ward. Another dear friend of mine invited us over for dinner (another answer to a very specific prayer) and we made it through our first day.

This Sunday marks our 4th week of Jason's deployment. 4 down and about 26 to go. To be honest, it has been tough. Very tough and very long. I'm told that the first month is the hardest, so I'm hoping that the time starts moving a little faster in the next couple weeks. I just don't ever feel completely whole. My other half is gone for 6 more months and if I think about it too much, I get way too sad, so I'm going to stop now. Peace out.