Sunday, February 20, 2011

My Parenting Woes....

Okay, so I’m reading this book called, Christ-like Parenting. I’ve really enjoyed it. The book focuses mostly on parenting teenagers, but the overall focus is very helpful and motivating. It talks a lot about parenting as Christ would (you probably caught that from the title). Kids need to know what is expected of them and they need consequences, but they don’t need those expectations and consequences screamed at them on a regular basis. This is where I struggle. I have felt prompted that I need to take these words to heart and try to overcome my tendency to yell and lose my patience so quickly. My problem…..it’s much easier to practice Christ-like parenting when you are in fact, Christ-like. Darn. I’m working on it.

I’m wishing there were more practical scenarios in the book that would help me know what to do in certain situations. For example, what should I do when I’ve told my 4 year old child to take the pile of toys upstairs to his bedroom and he, plain and simply, does not listen. As I’m typing this, I know what the problem is. I’ve trained said child to only pay attention and listen when I’ve gone through the motions of asking sweetly and have quickly transitioned into the “Do it or Die” mode. After I’ve screamed my instructions, he’s quick to say, “Okay!”. (He uses a tone that seems to say, “Wow, Mom. What’s the deal? It’s not like you’ve asked me twelve times already."). The kid then jumps on board the obedience train right away. I’ve got some work to do.

I’m hoping to fall off the wagon less and less. I’ll keep you posted on my progress.

5 comments:

Collette said...

When you figure out how to get them to react to the nice you, could you pass your wisdom on? Mine only respond to the deamon mother that comes out after repeating myself 15 times! It is lovely, isn't it?!

Aimee said...

I can remember doing the same thing as a kid to my mom. I knew the exact tone in her voice that "meant business" but until I'd hear that tone I'd continue on with what I wanted to do. I need to apologize to my mom. :) Good luck!

The Cooper's said...

Yeah, keep us posted on how it's going cause I would love to know what the tricks are!
I loved your Valentine post- what a fun day you guys had.

AJ said...

Who's the author? I could use a little lesson on that...

The Evans Clan said...

Well you're normal, so just face it :) I've been reading this book called, The Children You Want With the Kids You Have. I bought it while at Time Out For Women. It's pretty good, and explains how to train your kids to be responsible and obedient. We'll see how it works out. But it might be worth a shot for you. The only piece of advice i can tell you is that you should place yourself in their shoes and think about what it feels like to be yelled at. Or to hear other parents yell at their kids and feel like, ouch, I hope I don't sound like that when I talk to MY kids. Things can be overwhelming for those kiddos and they don't know where to start with a project (like cleaning up a mess). That's my own experience on the matter. So I try my best to stay level headed and explain things instead of yelling, but it sure doesn't last forever. We're all working toward becoming more Christ-like, we're never quite there permanently. So don't give up! And don't be so hard on yourself either! Life's not meant to be horrible, so make it pleasureable for everyone involved :) You know I love ya